Dear Awesome Woman,
Ever have an interaction with someone where you walk away, shaking your head, wondering what just happened? Why you acted like a wicked witch or a controlling queen bee with her stinger fully loaded?
Aahh, the answer may lie in this question “where are you launching from?” In fact, we can ask this question of ourselves, not just in interactions with others, but in everything that we do. I usually forget to ask myself this question, BUT when I do remember – the results can be truly wonderful.
The question “where am I launching from?” refers to the energy behind the action or interaction. And the energy stems from your thoughts. If you want certain results, check in with your thoughts before you engage. Let’s say Auntie Mathilda is popping in for a visit. Now you know from the past that after Auntie leaves, you feel like a deflated balloon. Something happens in your exchange with her that feels lousy. Perhaps she is critical or nosy or critical and nosy. Caught off guard, you may expose too much of yourself and be left feeling vulnerable or defensive.
But, if you take a moment to ask yourself “where am I launching from?” before Auntie Mathilda crosses that threshold, you are coming from a place of strength. You can set an intention for the interaction and therefore, choosethe energy that you show up with. Insteadof being the victim of a circumstance and scratching your head afterwards, you can be the leader.
You can decide that with Auntie Mathilda, you’ll do the asking. And if Auntie asks personal questions that feel uncomfortable for you to answer, you can share little and distract with questions of your own. The key is to decide what energy you want to present with and set the intention that feeds that. For example, “My interaction with Auntie is comfortable and enjoyable. I share only what feels good to me and come from a place of strength within me.”
Let’s say you need to make a request from an employee or a child – someone whom you have some authority over. If you fear that your request won’t be heeded, you may act like a controlling queen bee. But if you ask yourself “where am I launching from?” – “what energy do I want to use in this interaction?”, you may choose confidence and connection over fear. Your intention could be “I choose trust and connection in making requests. All my needs (not necessarily wants) are taken care of.” The other person will feel that calm, confident, connecting energy. They may or may not do what you are asking, but at least you did what was in your power to do – to choose consciously what energy you are bringing to the interaction.
The same goes with a business or creative endeavor. What thoughts are you thinking? Are they “this’ll never work, no one will like my ideas, project etc.”? Then the energy may feel heavy, not only to yourself, but others. Or can you launch with playful, curious energy? “I’ll enjoy sharing this and seeing what the feedback is.” That energy is much lighter.
So, go have fun with this. Embark on your journeys – those interactions and creative endeavors – with a sense of confidence and strength and see where it takes you. You may discover that launching from that kind of energy instead of fear based, defensive energy gives you more of what you are looking for.