Do You Know How To Care?
Mindbody Wellness Clarity tip
Dear Awesome Woman,
This time of quarantine can bring up so many emotions of grief, frustration, fear and sadness. The kids can feel overwhelmed by their zoom classes, our partner may have financial worries, our friends may feel lonely, sad and grieving. This is a wonderful opportunity to show you care.
But many of us have the tendency to try to fix problems, offer amazing solutions and give advice that we know will serve our loved ones best when they are hurting or sad. This is an easy trap to fall into when probably the most important thing that this person needs is a compassionate ear that listens and a shoulder to lean on. Just like when you are feeling discomfort, you may want to feel heard, understood, validated and cared for, so does your loved one.
But how can you when their emotions are triggering yours?
From a mindbody perspective, notice what it feels like in your body when a loved one is sad, frustrated or hurting. Do you feel discomfort? That feeling of uncomfortability will cause you to jump and solutionize your spouse’s problem, fix your child’s feelings or offer too much advice to a friend. You have entrained with their discomfort—meaning that you have synced your energy up with theirs.
But if you take a brief moment to notice the physical sensations in your own body— that leaning forward to take charge or that fear felt as nervousness in the stomach—and just breathe, then that pause can allow you to give them what they’re needing. You can stay in your own space as you give love to them.
My husband, Dovid Feldman, a marriage and family therapist, shared some beautiful advice in a blog post, “Do You Know How to Care?” Though his focus is on a partner relationship, you can apply this advice to any loved one. The key is not to go into your own tailspin of emotion, but to stay centered in your own energy as you offer helpful compassion to another. Your body and mind are the key.
Need a guiding hand? I invite you to schedule your Free Clarity call today. As a Somatic Healer, Clarity Coach and Relationship Expert, I help empower women to trust themselves through the wisdom of their bodies and intuition. Stress, pain and insomnia relief, career clarity, marriage magic for singles and couples, narcissistic relationship detoxing, and trauma processing can all be accomplished through Mindbody sessions over the phone. Download your free gift eguide: “3 Secrets to Solve Burnout and Get Energized the Mindbody Wellness Way.” More can be found at MiriamRacquel.com.
Feel free to forward this to friends and share the light of healing.