Why Does This Always Happen To Me?—Empowering a New Story
Mindbody Wellness Clarity Tips
Dear Awesome Woman,
So glad that you are here 🙂
Today, I’d like to talk about a kinder approach to the way you see yourself when a negative pattern shows up in your life. Have you ever asked yourself the question “why does this always happen to me?”
And that question has many different branches: why do I always pick people who I don’t feel understood by?; why am I surrounded by people who criticize me?; why do I always get jobs where I am underpaid and underappreciated? why do I have people in my life who take advantage of me? etc… You get the drift.
The question “why does this always happen to me?” feels like a low energy in the body. Go ahead and tune inwards when you ask yourself that question. Do you feel like your chest concaves or constricts and you just want to shrink in shame?
Do you feel empowered by that question or powerless?
Now try saying this instead (suggested by comedian Kyle Cease): “I’m doing something that I don’t see that I’m doing.” And rest your hand over your heart as a kindness to yourself.
Do you notice how much kinder this feels in your body? To me, it feels neutral and like there is a puzzle to solve but without any pressure. There is also compassion and no judgment.
This new statement and the compassionate space it gives you, allows for the empowerment to heal the negative pattern. You may need to do some inner shifting or tweaking of limiting beliefs that you’ve held onto from childhood, but there is no shame in that. Just humanness.
Here’s a suggestion to start that shifting of the negative pattern: look to the way that you are treating yourself. If you’re criticized by others, then point the finger back at you and notice where you are criticizing yourself.
If you’re feeling taken advantage of, point the finger back at you and notice how you are taking advantage of you. Decide to put some boundaries around your precious time, energy, and resources (please read: Boundaries are Beautiful For Your Health). Get more comfortable saying “no.”
There are many ways to do this inner tweaking. One of the ways suggested on Kyle Cease’s video is to practice The Work of Byron Katie. I use this methodology as part of the somatic healing I do with clients and the results are enlightening, allowing a freedom and peace of mind and body that didn’t exist before.
I also do inner child work and shadow healing with my clients to empower neuropathway shifts for stress and trauma release.
Whatever way you choose to change negative patterns in your life, I invite you to do it with compassion to yourself. Self-kindness relaxes the nervous system and is life changing!
Need a helping hand? As a Somatic Healer and Clarity Coach, I help busy women step into their radiant power through quick shifts towards transformational healing, marriage tune-ups, and toxic relationship detoxes. You can easily schedule a Free Clarity call here. Looking forward to hearing your voice 🙂
Please download your free gift e-guide: “3 Secrets to Solve Burnout and Get Energized the Mindbody Wellness Way” (also gives access to your free download of “Escape from the Borderline/Narcissist’s Web”).
If you’re a woman who would love to enjoy a peaceful marriage and home and be empowered as an individual, I can help you achieve that. Somatic healing sessions are the way. Download your free e-guide: 6 Simple Tips to Up the Vibe of Your Marriage Today! I also team up with my husband, Dovid Feldman, LPC, AMFT, in our Recreating Intimacy Couple’s Workshop to help heal marriages and get couples the emotional safety, love and connection they desire.
Sharing a few testimonials from clients whose lives have been transformed and you can check out more @ Client Love:
“Miriam Racquel has the unique ability to invite you to HEAL. Releasing pain, dismantling mental distortions and replacing those with truths, and gaining new perspectives improved my emotional well-being, physical health, and personal/family relationships. She is a pleasure to work with: I leave smiling and encouraged! She has breadth of training & resources, which I’m grateful to continue to learn from. Thank you, Miriam Racquel!” – L.H., Utah
“I am floored every time I enter a session feeling tied up in knots, and come out the other side with clarity and calm. It often becomes clear that the reason I was stuck in my decision-making process was an underlying issue that only became apparent through the work I was doing with Miriam Racquel. She is gifted at helping women get in touch with their own wisdom. I wish every woman could have such a coach, and feel blessed to call her mine!”– Sharon, Chicago, Illinois
Share with a friend and pass on the light of Mindbody Wellness for all women.